Practice What You Preach

It's not that I don't believe in God, I do. What bothers me is the whole 'my way or no way' concept. It’s said that God created us in his image. Does this mean that he didn't know that some people would be gay? A question I've often wondered. There was a period when I attended church regularly. There was a time I sang in the choir. There was a time when I read the Bible and believed every word verbatim. But then I got older and realized a lot of what's written in the Bible was written by man-not God. It was his interpretation of what supposedly happened. I then started to pull back. I wasn't attending church as often. I thought if man wanted others to think of his way instead of His way, what would stop him from writing down what he wanted people to believe in-his own mortal views.

I believe God loves all his children, not just the straight ones, but the gay ones too. He loves us all. The sick ones, the healthy ones. The good ones, the bad ones. We are a reflection of Him. Unfortunately some churches paint a very harsh picture of what the 'right way' is supposed to be and this discourages people from attending and believing in God. It's a struggle that I've dealt with. When I was in my twenties, I stopped attending church as I became aware of my sexuality. My family questioned why. How could I tell them that I was attracted to men and yet sit in the congregation and hear that this was 'bad'? I would be condemned to hell for all eternity. I started to feel uncomfortable and isolated. Ultimately I stopped attending altogether.

The older I've become I'm more comfortable with myself, thus more comfortable with people around me. In the past junior has had questions about God and I answered them as best I can, but I want him to attend church and hear about God first hand. I don't want him to deprive him of that. But on the other hand, I don't want him to feel that he's living in a hell-fire-and-brimstone life with Tonio and I. I do want to choose a church. I do want to attend on Sundays with my family. I do want to be comfortable walking in with my man and my son. I do want to sing hymns and maybe join a choir. I want to feel good, praise God and give thanks like everyone else. I shouldn't have to lie or be uncomfortable about who I am and the life that I live.

Churches teach: love, unity, understanding, compassion. But does this apply only to the heterosexual people? What about the gay community? Don't they deserve everything just as much as their straight counterparts? Does this apply to only the Black community and not the other races? What is it really teaching? I thought the message was meant for everyone. It's hard. It's hard to find a good church to begin with, much less one that accepts everyone, truly 'as they are'.

Its 2008, are there any churches out there that practice what it preaches?