Is It Worth It?

I recently heard an unsubstantiated rumor about a couple close to me. He has been accused of cheating on his wife. At first I was surprised, but then realized that anyone is capable of it.

When asked why the wife thinks her husband is cheating, she responded, "He spends a lot of time online. They talk a lot and sometimes talk about me." This is what I heard second-hand. I don't know the details or the frequency. What I do know is, taking the accusation at face value, it's not cheating. However there's a very fine line between friendship and taking it just a little further. Especially with this new computer age, it's easy to find yourself talking to someone who seems 'nice' or 'friendly'. Not everyone out there wants to put the moves on you, but be careful there are some people who do have ulterior motives. If discussing intimate details and/or spending lots of time with this person sound familiar, you could be on the road to destruction.

An emotional relationship can sometimes be the key to open the door to a physical one. There are people that wait on the sidelines for something to go wrong in your relationship and they're there to lend a shoulder for you to cry on. When you're distracted, they swoop right in and tell you what you want to hear. All that emotion festering and eventually comes to a boil and that 'friend' is there to help you let off that steam. Before you know it, you've gone and done something that you regret.

I've been on both sides of the cheating fence and I'm not proud of either. No matter how justified I felt at the time. Don't do it out of revenge. It’s just not worth it. Be the bigger person. If there's any hope of a reconciliation, the two of you are fighting constantly, no one's listening to the other and it appears hopeless, continue to try some more. Do everything you can and truly exhaust all your options. If all else fails, maybe a break-up is best before starting something with the next. There's nothing worse than having a triangle in your relationship. If you feel the urge to cheat, let the urge pass. It’s worth taking the time to talk things out with your boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, partner, whatever you call them and air out everything. Once you cheat, there's no going back. Saying sorry won't cut it.

So how do you know if an innocent email or IM or text or conversation is going "too far"? Rule of thumb, if it's something that you'd feel uncomfortable saying in front of your mate, then you probably shouldn't say it.