Pasts

A past. Everyone has one. Whether it was full of good times, or not so good times, you had to have gotten past the past to make it to today. For some the past haunts them and holds them back making it impossible to truly live in the today and now. For others the past is but a distant memory of both positive and negative on which they’ve built a secure foundation to live out the present and claim their future. Yet and still for some the past was so terrible that they’ve either blocked out those bad memories or tried to erase them altogether to protect themselves today and move on. Whatever category you fall into, remember that the past is there for a reason. Good or bad you wouldn’t be here today without it. It happened. You reacted. And here you are today.

When in a relationship, not only do you deal with your own past, but your partner’s past. Whose are you more easily to accept? If you let it, it can become an issue and begin to affect your relationship. Acknowledge that the past did happen and 9 times out of 10 you were not a part of your partner’s life when things occurred, so why beat yourself up over it? Move on, you and your partner have a lifetime filled with love, happiness and your “firsts” together that need to be the core focus for both of you. That’s what matters. That’s what’s important.

I used to question “why, why, why?” when I was younger. Now I answer, “that’s why, that’s why, that’s why”. Could my past have been better? Sure. Do I wish I could change any part of it? Yes. But I can’t. Accepting that reality is the first part of maturing and moving on. I’m grateful for my past. Now I may truly appreciate and cherish what I have today.